Hero: Manuel Uribe

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 Interesting Facts:

  • founded an organization to help over weight people
  • excess weight has plagued him for more than 20 years, most of which he has spent in bed
  • runner up for world’s record of largest dump produced by a mammal

Find out more about Manuel here.

Boobies

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Is there anything greater on God’s earth than a chick with nice large jugs?  Seriously.  I’m not trying to be a pig here.  I think women should be flattered that a man would worship them based on something that was completely out of their control.  Obviously, I’m talking about women with natural ones.  The fake ones are often too balloon-like for my liking.  But huge, round, natural orbs of fleshly goodness make me want to get down on my knees and thank The Higher Power for creating them.  Is that so wrong?

Tammy Faye Baker

Tammy Faye Bakker Messner
1942-2007

Trannies, Estee Lauder, & L’Oreal mourn.

Doug Markwith

This is Doug Markwith from Tucson, Arizona and he is a photographer.

Apparently, several parents in Doug’s neighborhood don’t like him all that much.  Why?  Here are the details according to The Tucson Citizen:

“A conflict between a local adult Web site photographer and parents of Rita Ranch teens is heading to court, where the city is challenging his home-based business.

Doug Markwith, 27, who has taken nude photos of women ages 18 and older in his home for his Web site business, is accused of two city zoning violations.

In a summons obtained July 9, the City Attorney’s Office contends that Markwith failed to seek city approval to run a home business and that his specific type of business – adult photography – is not permitted in his home in the Rita Ranch neighborhood, zoned as an R-2 residential area.

Markwith said that if he loses when he goes to court Tuesday, he might be forced to move to continue his business because renting a separate studio is not an affordable option.

‘I’m a fairly level-headed guy and I don’t want to cause any problems,” he said. “I don’t even shoot much in my home. Usually what I do for work is editing.'”

It’s pretty obvious what the situation is here right? 

Doug’s profession involves sex and the crusty, limp-dicked, citizens of Doug’s neighborhood have to stamp this sinful behavior from their village to keep the god’s happy.  Forget the facts that Doug is doing this in the privacy of his own home and not trying to corrupt anyone underage or flaunt his obviously sin-filled lifestyle in their faces.  He simply works in the sex industry and that makes him an evil person. 

So these fine, upstanding, non-sex-industry citizens use the current zoning law to legislate their morality.  Why, he can’t run a business from his house because it’s zoned residential. 

How many of these fine, upstanding citizens do you think sell things on e-bay?  Or from time to time buy and sell stocks from their portfolio online?  Maybe take out an ad on occassion and sell something from the garage?  But they’re not violating the zoning ordinance.  Are they?  Of course not.  What stupid question.

There is no better place to start than at the beginning so this is where we will begin.

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